Monday, March 30, 2009

FROM MY PERSPECTIVE-INTRODUCING MYSELF

Hey Bitches! After previous guest bloggers, I have some really big shoes (stilletos, please) to fill.

Truly though, this is so exciting and quite a challenge for me. I have never blogged before. There, I said it, you all now know just how far behind the times I am! Derek and Romain want me to blog from my perspective. So just what the hell is my perspective? I have looked at life from many different perspectives; as many perspectives as I have been given labels. I started off being labeled a "little boy", then went on to be a "sissy boy," from there to a "straight young man," then a "gay young man," to a "pre-op male to female transsexual," onto an "intersexed" (I was born with Kleinfelter's Syndrome giving me an extra X chromosome) pre-op transsexual, and then, after sex reassignment surgery, for the bulk of my life, a "straight woman." Truthfully, after all the labels, I just prefer to think of myself these days as a "queer woman." However, if you want to refer to me affectionately and only affectionately, as your favorite "tranny trucker", I won't mind!

When I discovered OutQ and the Derek and Romaine Show 2 1/2 years ago, I had been out of this community for twenty-five years. When I immersed myself in being a straight woman, our community was in the middle of the AIDS crisis and Harvey Milk had been dead for five years. There were gay men and lesbians and the poor hidden step children, were the trannies! Listening to the station and how far our community has come over the years, gave me a powerful desire to reconnect. I have been able to do that through OutQ and I am so grateful. I think, as Trucker James, stated in his last blog, we don't always realize what trailblazers people like Derek and Romain are. I have no doubt, however, that history will show them to be so.

So, to help understand my perspective, whatever that may be, let me tell you a bit about myself. I am a long haul truck driver. I have been living the trucking lifestyle (it is so much more than just a job) on and off for the last 20 years. In his blog, Trucker James so eloquently described this lifestyle, and I completely agree with everything he wrote. There are some differences being a woman truck driver as opposed to being a man and I will try to explore some of these differences in later blogs.

I am 55 years old and my house is in a small town in the Ozark Mountains of southern Missouri. I can't honestly say I live there, because being there 5 days a month and in my truck the other 25 days, I actually live in my truck and visit my house! It is a very hillbilly and redneck area and how I wound up there is another story for another time. I have been married very briefly to a woman and for several years each to two different straight men who did not know I had been born with a "terrible growth in my vagina!" While transitioning in my mid-twenties, I had a psychologist tell me the only way I would ever have the "normal" life as a woman that I craved, would be to keep that secret. I had my surgery in 1982 and after an initial period of getting to know my new body, I moved on to my "normal" life. Unfortunately, as a "normally" very open and honest person, it came at a very high price. Would I do it all again the same way-I honestly don't know! Things are changing for transpeople from when I was transitioning. They have not come anywhere near as far as things have for other parties of our "community", but I believe with continued education and enlightenment by people who have the courage to embrace it, things may one day get to a place where being born in the wrong body does not have to be a "dirty little secret.

I recently had a very long conversation with an admitted "transphobe" gay white male. I won't give any names, but his initials are "Trucker James"! We spoke at length about the differences of being "trans" as opposed to being "gay". Like so many other gay men, not having been personally exposed to many transpeople, and never, himself, ever feeling like he did not belong in his own body, he truly had no point of reference to what being "trans" was like until he was educated and enlightened by yours truly. I have heard from gay men, too many times, what I heard in a phone call from "Bush in Tennessee" last year on the Michelangelo Signorile Show last year, how they don't believe anyone other than gay people belong in their community. This makes me just as angry as some people were when so many African Americans and Hispanics voted for Proposition 8 in California denying same sex marriage. People were angy because they thought after all the discrimination people of color had been through, they would have to understand the plight of the gays! Those people, too, like all straight people, truly need to be educated and enlightened.

The bottom line here, people, is that all of us "queer" folk, because of what we have been through in our own lives trying to gain acceptance, all need to be educated and enlightened to the differences and similarities in each other so we can learn to embrace them, as opposed to being threatened by them. I have been known by so many labels in my life and there are so many labels in our L,G,B ,T, I (intersexed). . . .X, Y Z community, I would just rather be a queer woman, loving and supporting and being loved and supported by all "queer" people. There is a site that I find very informative if you are interested in all thing trans. It is "Susan's Place", http://www.susans.org/Transitioning/

Love and Hugs - Trucker Patti

FROM MY PERSPECTIVE-TRUCKER PATTI

Hey Bitches! I am sitting in a truck stop about to listen to Monday night's show. I will try to be thorough, since I can blog as the show unfolds. If in the future, if I have to be driving during the show, it might not be as complete!

The show started off with Derek and Romaine talking about being at the GLAD awards. The gay media was bowing and scraping and falling all over themselves to interview closet gays and that sterling example of gayness- GAYKIN (better known as Clay Aiken)! Bravo to Derek for calling attention to star struck media reporters who truly should be paying attention to people in the community who are true role models, instead of trying to fully insert their coiffed heads into the asses of those who truly are not worthy! Derek is so right when he talks about "holding our own people to the fire" to make the things that need to happen, happen! I got chills hearing Romaine say "get out there on the front lines" and reminding us about how effective she and her angels were against that evil, sick, twisted Fred Phelps! After Lisa (she and Baby Daddy are regular callers who are straight and very supportive of our community) called in, Romaine reminded us how we need to cultivate our straight allies. From my perspective one of the most important things we can do to make this happen is to finally get it through our heads that in order to achieve equality, we need to put forward a cohesive community-not a bunch of self-agrandizing prima donas!

Tom Goss
 was the bitches' first guest promoting his new album, "Back To Love" . The former seminarian, who was cured of Christianity while attending seminary, talked about being in love, getting married and buying a house. Oh to be so young and full of the future again. I have been there, though, and it is a lovely place to be. Tom performed a sweet and simple love song ("Till The End") that was an ode to his boyfriend/fiance'. You can learn more about Tom at www.tomgossmusic.com

Next, was the inside dish at the awards-Romaine ran up the stairs in her comfotable lesbian shoes, while Derek escourted the absolutely gorgeous, stilleto clad (a girl after my own heart) Katie up the stairs. As much as he wanted to crack a joke, Derek kept the dignity of the moment. He decided to save his best remarks for us bitches! The thermostat at the facility was not set correctly for the weather, so a hot and sweaty time was had by all!

Then Ryan in Connecticut called in. He was focused and articulate. It was AWFUL! I love our crazy, hot mess Ryan in Connecticut and I want him back! Then we heard from Enrique wanting to know where the pictures of Certifiable's truck were. Derek said to check out the official show website, www.derekandromaine.com , but it's not there-LOL. Certifiable sent it to Derek and he is not exactly sure where it is. Maybe he will find it and post it!

And then. . . .Derek's dad hitting on Romaine's friend Kristin-OMG! According to Derek, the always outrageous Hedda Lettuce,who was sitting between Derek and Romaine at the table at the GLAD awards, deserves an award for best off, off, off, off, off , broadway show for her performance at the Cineplex.

The best moment at the awards, according to Derek, occurred whe a guy came up to him who was at the GayVN Awards last year and told them that this special was a much better direction for Derek and Romaine to go in! Romaine should have punched him! They were awesome at the GayVNs! However, I think the best moment really was when the Battlestar Gallactica publicist told Derek they should have lunch. How far will Derek go for Battlestar Gallactica memorabilia???

Romain summed up the GLAD Award night as having a crummy time on the red carpet, but a great time hanging out with Hedda Lettuce.

Next-Mailbag Monday! Romaine started off by complaining that no one e-mails her anymore-could that be because she doesn't answer her e-mail? However, she managed to come up with a couple. Also, bitches, if you got your newsletter, obviously "Jennifer Brown" was a typo. Falcon does not have female exclusive. It is actually one of our favorite hunky, hot mess celebrity co-hosts, Eric Rhodes!

Derek will have a surprise announcement regarding something happening in the southwest the first week of May, that a listener will be invited to join. More information will be out by the end of the week.

Jay in Kentucky wrote asking about the bitches appearing at Phoenix Pride which will be April 18-19. They will be there, tipsy or sober!

Derek Price called in to talk about the drunk guy that mistook our Derek for him at the GLAD awards. He admitted that he had been with the guy once and had passed out on him, once upon a time!!! The gays just love their fun and games!!

Romaine is going to Dinah this week! Wow! She feels like it has snuck up on her and she is not ready, but I firmly believe she is up for the challenge. She will hook up there with the Frank DeCaro show's own Doria Biddle. They will be there for the whole weekend. Friday's Frank DeCaro show starting at 11:00am eastern, 8:00am west coast, will feature Derek as Frank's co-host and then the DNR show, starting at 6:00 pm eastern, 3:00pm west coast, will be the Doria and Romaine show, live from Dinah. Our own Greg the cupcake will be with the girls in Palm Springs-how will he deal with all those drunk, half naked lesbians!!!

While waiting for the next guess, Steve called in all bummed about being single-Derek and Romaine gave a great pep talk. I think Steve has been calling in since I have been listening with the same problem. He has a great life, but no boyfriend. Keep looking Steve. And then there was the one and only Super Fag being sweet and sincere talking about being happy with his husband half the time and figuring out how to off him for the life insurance!

And then. . . . Gainesville Florida upholds anti-discrimination rights! A caller outs a guy he doesn't know to a girl he does-she thinks he is straight. How will it play out, stay tuned . . . .

The next guest was Carolyn Hennessy
, who plays Diane Miller , the mob lawyer and bed partner of Sonny Corinthos on "General Hospital" and who's latest book is "Pandora Get's Lazy", the third in the Pandora series. Carolyn says there will be seven in the series. It is a series for young people aged 8 and up. Romaine discussed with her how they compare with J.K. Rowling's "Harry Potter" series and Carolyn noted that J.K. Rowling paved the way for her and single handedly raised the literacy rate in the world. Look for her in the upcoming "Cougartown" on ABC, with Courtney Cox-Arquette where she plays a real estate agent by day and and oversexed cougar at night.

Do some celebrities get rejected for the DNR show, just ask Dominick, Carolyn Hennessy's publicist who is also the publicist for Michelle Clooney. But, will he really bring someone to the show from the movie "Angels and Demons"?? Stay tuned!

Lesson for the night-don't leave your nudie pics in a taxi cab, Bobbie might find them!

Tomorrow is Romaine's 31'st birthday-what will her presents be??

Okay bitches, this is it for my first show blog. I tried to highlight what I found interesting. I will be interested in your feedback.

Love and Hugs - Trucker Patti


Saturday, March 28, 2009

Attention Bitches


Hey Bitches,

G.M. in Philly will be doing the show recap from Friday's show, I had a date (I don't get them very often, so let me off the hook), have a good weekend Bitches.

Trucker James

Friday, March 27, 2009

The GLAAD Award Winning Derek and Romaine


Well, Bitches, I was out on the town on Friday's show and somehow only got to hear the parts of show that I was mentioned in (my ears must have been burning). So, I asked a favor of G.M. in Philly to do the show recap from Friday. (Thanks G.M.).

I actually have spent as much time thinking about this post (my last regular one for a while) as I did all of the other posts in the last week. I wanted to think of something fitting and gracious to say about Derek and Romaine:

Many of us take for granted every day turning on Sirius 109 or XM 98 and listening to The Bitches talk about dildos, Angelina Jolie or Derek's newest chemical to keep his skin that of a 4 week old baby's bottom and we don't take time to think about how amazing it is that they even have a radio show, let alone one that has been on for 6 years now. I am 35 years old and I can remember in my life not being about to say the word "gay" or "lesbian" without a lynch mob or an equally unpleasant dirty look. Now we celebrate ass sex and double fisting five days a week, (UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE!!!), but have many of you taken the time to ever really know who Derek Hartley and Romaine Patterson are? Sure you know that Romaine was a friend of Matthew Shephard's. And yes, we all know that Derek has had many, many, many fabulous jobs. Did you realize that Romaine was the first person to make people realize you didn't have to put of with Fred Phelps and his band of crazies at a funeral or that Derek was a gay journalist when the internet was a relatively new thing? Did you realize that when Derek and Romaine first went on the air in 2003 gay marriage in any state wasn't legal yet? Now 6 years later, they received their first GLAAD Media Award (it's about Fraking time) and it was well deserved.

I spent tonight driving up I-75 from Atlanta to Ohio listening the The Laramie Project: 10 Years Later - The Lasting Legacy Of Matthew Shepard for the 5th and 6th time and just couldn't believe that I know people, personally, that are capable of making such a beautiful and relevant piece of history. If you haven't heard it you really need to, SiriusXM has made it available for download at Sirius OutQ.

I guess I started wondering why we don't have more voices out there receiving awards that are actually gay. I mean yes, Clay Aiken received an award for finally coming out (You SOOOO called that Derek) and T.R. Knight plays a lovely straight girl on Grey's Anatomy. And yes, Tyra is a crazy Tranny that has a couple of shows on TV. Derek and Romaine are gay in real life and they play gay on the radio. It seems like a simple concept, but they are one of the few in history to receive such an honor.

I have met Derek and Romaine, I know that the characters they play on their radio show are in complete contrast to the people they are in real life. I know that they do not get paid by SiriusXM to go to pride events and meet their listeners, I know that often it can be difficult to leave their friends and families to come and hang out with us, but they do it gladly. I know that they take time to talk to everyone who walks up to them at an event to make sure they tell them they appreciate them coming out. I know that eventually when Derek and Romaine move on to new careers and paths in life, that they will look back at meeting their listeners, their friends and smile.

I want anyone who reads this to let people know about OutQ and Derek and Romaine, not because you'll get a prize, but because this is Gay History, Our History and the more people who know about it, the more people who are exposed to it, the more they understand it. The less we will be relegated to the closet.

I just want to say that I am honored to listen to Derek and Romaine every day, I am honored to call them my friends, I was honored to be asked to tell you Bitches about them for the last week and look forward to the years ahead calling in and sharing my inane life with people who really do make a difference.

Talk to you soon Bitches.

Trucker James

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Thursday's Show Recap

Hey Bitches, tonight's show had a lot of fun guests that had tons of great info for the listeners. In the first hour, Kelli O'Donnell and Gregg Kaminski from RFamilyVacations came in to talk about the RFamily Vacations Alaskan Cruise that sets sail July 11th -18th. Derek, Romaine, Mistress Sam, Betty, Iris and a hordes of listeners (including myself) will be going this summer, so grab your stylish glasses and your rifle (not really) bitches, we are going to see if we can see Russia. If you need more info on how to prepare or what to expect head over to RFamilyForums and chat with some of the other listeners that are going.

In the second hour, Thomas Neiss from Pride Pro Wrestling called in to tell The Bitches about the first ever GLBT professional wrestling organization. They are having their first event XSViolence at Club XS in York, PA on Saturday March 28th. So, put on your spandex unitard and go check it out. Don't worry, if you can't make it to PA, they are planning on taking it on tour, watch the website for upcoming dates.

Melora Hardin, Jan from NBC's Hit Show The Office sat down with The Bitches to talk about her directorial debut of the film YOU, a heartfelt story about what might happen if you lost your soulmate.(sounds like you need a box of tissues), The movie will be available later this month on Itunes, Amazon and Hulu.com. For more info on Melora Hardin just click her name and go check out her website.

What's Your Gay Problem posed some serious questions for Derek and Romaine tonight and they dished out some of the best advice I've personally ever heard. To start Bob in MD called into to ask for permission to dump his high-powered partner whom he just found out likes to wear diapers and act like a baby. Melissa in KY called in to give some advice to Bob, drawing his attention to website, Infantilism.org to understand his partner better. A new first time caller, Lisa, called in to find out if she is gay (if you have to ask honey) and is worried that she will have to break up her family to find her true self. The Bitches were very supportive and gave her some damn good advice. Enrrrrrique called in to realize that he shouldn't throw away friendships over internalized homophobia, Richard from somewhere (sorry) called in because since his coming out, his Bitch Sister won't let him see his nephews, because since he's gay, he'll molest them. Derek really gave it to Richard, saying that he should tell his sister that if she is worried about the kids being molested that she should really keep them away from straight men, "CAUSE THAT'S WHO'S MOLESTING KIDS".

Diana Cage was fashionably late for The Happy Hour, but I do know that she is now an Editor at GO Magazine, the nation's largest lesbian publication. (You Go Girl). She and Emma (her beau for almost a year) have been doing a video blog series on VelvetParkMedia.com, check it out and get your Lesbaincentric fix that you're dying for. After we plugged everything that the Incomparable Miss Cage is doing these days, we found out she was wearing tights with no underwear and then she got a lot of love from regular DCShow callers like Trucker Patti, Andre on LI, Robin in CA, Pierre in MO, Driver John and others. If you are wondering what Diana is up to, go to her website DianaCage.com, become her Facebook and/or Myspace friend, she would really love to hear from you. Then DNRShow.net's very own G.M. in Philly ended the show just like it began, with a little bit of crazy and Derek and Romaine's first ever double and triple dial tones for poor G.M. It was an awesome end to an incredible show. See you tomorrow Bitches.

Trucker James

Who Wants To Marry A Trucker (or at least have sex with one)

Hey Bitches, often during the What's Your Gay Problem Segment, our saviors Derek and Romaine are asked by many of our trucker listeners, "How do I meet another truck driver?" Well, I'm about to answer (or at least give you a place to start) that question for you. (and all of you non-truckers, you can use the same advice to meet truckers too). I have gone 'round the Interwebs to compile a list of 21st century dating and hook up sites that market themselves to truckers and the people who love them. Unfortunately, for all you lesbian truckers out there, no one loves you because I couldn't find one place for you to meet, so I am not discriminating, I think it is because every knows lesbians are cheap and won't shell out the coins for a membership (sorry ladies, it's a horrible stereotype).

Often times when The Bitches would get this question, they would often send people to www.TruckChaser.com, well, I am sorry to inform everyone that this site closed down on 3/1/2009 due to economic concerns, but TC and Tuffhawl now have their own blog, which has many of the same features the site did, including message boards, hot pics and fun stories, you can check it out at TruckChaser.blogspot.com.

The next two on the list I am going to tell you about at the same time. They are GayRestArea.com and GayTruckStop.com, the reason I am putting those into the same review is they are both the product of a fellow Derek and Romaine listener Trucker Jeff. He seems to have to corner of the market right now on hooking up the truckers. GayRestArea.com, in my opinion, is more of a message board, it is almost like traveling back in time to 1993 and cruising online like the good ole days. It does have a chat area, but the number of people active on the site seems limited. GayRestArea.com does offer free access and a $2.95 per month Gold Upgrade Package, that also in my opinion, doesn't really give you all the much more than the free access. Regardless of the limited content, free is never a bad option.

Next is Trucker Jeff's other site GayTruckStop.com, it also is a little more on the low tech side, but it has a fair amount of members, it has the highest price (of the 3) of $15.95 per month (with discounts for longer) for a Gold Membership. The Gold Membership Upgrade gives you access to additional pictures and Webcam Chat. All in all, it will definitely give you some options of meeting someone.

Finally, there is GayTruckers.com, definitely has a different feel from the other two websites with more of a polished look, but it has many of the same features of the other two websites mentioned. It does have instant messaging, profiles with tons of pictures, video, message boards and chat (unfortunately no webcam option though). Where it does have a free membership option, it is very fairly priced at $19.95 per year for membership that gives you access to all of the upgraded features.

Well, that's it Bitches, those are the sites that are available to meet truckers. Now, these websites aren't really designed for you to meet a husband (they are mostly for sex) but there are some nice people who are on these sites and you will probably have some luck for whatever you are looking for. Catch you later Bitches.

Trucker James

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Wednesday's Desperately Fucking Angry

Hey Bitches, what can I say, the topic that is on everyone's mind tonight after Desperately Fucking Angry was LESBIAN DRAMA!!! Robin in CA called the show talking about how all of the women she has met recently are crappy and have an agenda (whatever that means), except for Lowgear whom she hasn't been talking to. And then Lowgear called in to rat out Robin for being a CFL (Crazy Fucking Lesbian) and it turned into a Best Of a Diana Cage Show (who incidentally will be returning to the airwaves at SiriusXM during the Happy Hour of DnR on Thursday's show.) Well, long story short, Desperately Fucking Angry was Lesbian Dramafest 2009 (March 2009, at least)! Other, less sober(ing) callers were Ryan in CT with another glimpse into mental illness and/or substance abuse, a bunch of callers calling in to bitch about teachers (don't they have it hard enough?) either not caring enough, caring too much, being "mean" to kids, yada, yada, yada. Mr. Hartley made the best point of the conversation when he said that teachers have the hardest job in the world trying to deal with parents who expect the teachers to raise their kids. (Damn, Derek, handsome and insightful, how do you handle it?), and a bunch of other calls that I can't remember because I was already drunk on Margaritas!! (Sorry Bitches)

I just want to give a great big KUDOS to DNRShow.net's very own G.M. in Philly who tonight had the debut of his very own Internet Radio Show on www.BlogTalkRadio.com, his show The OutQ Review with GM in Philly was a huge success. G.M.'s new show featured a recap of the shows from OutQ including The Frank DeCaro Show, The Michelangelo Signorile Show and Everyone's Favorite (it better fucking be) The Derek and Romaine show, it also had a slew of regular OutQ callers including Trucker Patti, Eric in Chicago, Michelle in S.F. and myself. His next show will be on Saturday March 11th at 11:00PM Eastern, 7:00PM Pacific. G.M. has a dream of being in broadcasting and he's definitely making it happen, Bravo G.M., Bravo. Make sure you tune in and show your support for our very own future talk radio host.

Well Bitches, that's it for my blog tonight, los Margaritas are starting to wear off and you know what that means, it's time to drink some more! I just want to thank everyone who has been so supportive of my work here on DNRShow.net, I am having a blast doing it and hope to be around for a very long time. See you tomorrow Bitches.

Trucker James

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Free Advertising For Derek And Romaine

Hey Bitches, this here is a photo of an actual glory hole in a trucker's rest area on Interstate 80 in Middlebury, Indiana. Now Betty doesn't have to wonder what a glory hole is, she and the show actually have their own. The innovative listener should receive a Clarisonic Skin Care System (please?). Click on the photo to get a huge view of niche adverstising.

Trucker James

Tuesday's Koffee Klatch

Hey Bitches, before I talk about the show I want to say something to Anonymous, the mysterious commentator here on The Official Derek and Romaine Show Blog. COME OUT OF THE CLOSET!!! First, you complain, over and over, that Michelle, GM and myself talk about ourselves. Well, I will agree with you, to a point. If this were just a show recap, what's the point in having listeners recycle every part of the show? They have interns that could do that. I really don't think it would be all that interesting to not know anything about the person who is posting. I mean, would you rather Anderson Cooper just stick to the news and not talk about his love of Beyonce? No, you wouldn't. If you're here just for a show recap, my advice is, pay the $12.95 per month and actually listen to the show, or SHUT THE FUCK UP!!

Ok, tonight's Koffee Katch, started out kinda mellow, then the crazies came out of the woodwork like it was Friday at 8:30, we had bi polar calls from G.M. in Philly, Ryan in CT, Stanton in Austin, Trucker Patty, Jarrod in LA, and Michelle in SF. All of these calls had their own brand of crazy, from Ryan realizing (about 6 years too late) that Derek is the best looking host on all of OutQ to Stanton trying to "technically" (bullshit) explain why he doesn't blog on the Official Show Blog here at DNRShow.net. G.M. was his usually Lithium-free high energy self and Michelle, well, Michelle was Michelle. And Derek did not disappoint, every one of these calls ended in our beloved dial tone.

The Bitches told Lowgear that Kevin in Minnesota was starting a thread on the message boards on RFamilyVacations.com to tell the tons of listeners who going how to prepare and what to take on the R Family Vacations Alaskan Cruise July 11th through the 18th. So, everyone should take a vacation with The Bitches this summer.

I just want to thank Lowgear and Trucker Tori for the nice comments they made to Derek and Romaine about my first blog post. It's nice to know someone is reading.

Well, it was a quite an hour, looking forward to the next hour Bitches.

Trucker James

Derek and Romaine from a Trucker Perspective!


Hey Bitches! When I called in tonight to thank The Bitches for the opportunity to be a part of their show blog here at DNRShow.net. Romaine said something that made me think, she said that it would be interesting to have a Trucker's Perspective.
I thought about it and realized the only people who would find that interesting would be other truckers, so I first need to tell you Bitches what it's like to be a Truck Driver and what truckers mean to you.

First of all, for me, driving a truck is the best job in the world. Where else can you sit on your ass 12 hours a day, make plenty of money and be able to listen to Derek and Romaine (besides SiriusXM that is). A lot of us Trucker Bitches are Over The Road Drivers, that means we spend days, weeks and some of us months driving around the country sleeping in a space the size of a small closet, (No Mary, you don't have room for 400 pairs of shoes). It can suck though to not a have social life or have the time or opportunity to meet someone special, but that's why Derek and Romaine go to Pride Events and Festivals (do you actually think it's for themselves? No Bitches, they hit the road for us). I could go on and on about being a trucker, but you get the gist.

What truckers mean to you...Everything you own, use, consume or even just fucking take for granted came on a truck. Unless you are the Unibomber or some hairy arm-pitted, living off the land lesbian in Vermont, it traveled by truck. Your iPhone, your car, your Rolling Rock, everything. Just listen to the Guess My Load call in game the Bitches play on the show and you will realize all the crazy shit we haul. Now that you Bitches know a little about truckers and what we do go find one and give him/her oral sex (I mean a thank you).

How Derek and Romaine fit into a trucker's day is very important. The non-trucker Bitches really only get to listen to the show on their way home from work, or in between meetings at the office. The truckers get to listen to the whole fucking show every day (and even the Best Of's). Where a person with a normal schedule gets to go out with their friends for cocktails and catch Grey's Anatomy on TV, most of us truckers turn off our phones, we tune into Koffee Klatch and The Happy Hour as a sort of surrogate to meeting up with our friends for a drink. Some of us call in to Desperately Fucking Angry to vent our (sometimes misplaced) frustration and pissyness, some of us call into What's Your Gay Problem, sometimes with pointless dribble (Jeremiah) and sometimes with heartfelt problems dealing with sexual identity because there is no one else we will ever talk to about it. And some of us just call in to hit on Greg the Cupcake. All of this is why Derek and Romaine is now a GLAAD Award Winning Radio Show.

We, the truckers, were the first to take notice of The Bitches' raunchy, in your face, full frontal assault on normalcy, and we'll still be listening when SiriusXM has to cancel the show because there isn't another possible fart joke or porn star to be interviewed (like that will ever happen).

Trucker James
(the picture above IS my truck)

Monday, March 23, 2009

My First Post To The Bitches' Blog!!! Woo Hoo!!

Hey Bitches, I am honored for Derek And Romaine to invite me to blog on the official DNR Show Blog. The first thing I want to say it what a great job Michelle in S.F. and G.M. in Philly have done so far. Now it's time for them to see what a real super fan can do.

I am looking forward to bringing you a new and fun take on the show over the next week and will hopefully end up here for a lot longer. If you have any suggestions or want to get to know me better shoot me a message and I will definitely take the time to talk to you.

Trucker James

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Facebook Famous!

One of our listeners, Josh, works for Facebook and he asked me if I wanted a vanity url for my fan page and of course the answer is yes! As soon as I saw the word "vanity" I was in. Becky Sharp can suck it!

So now thanks to our wonderful listener Josh, you can find my Facebook page simply and easily at facebook.com/derekhartley! Awesome!

Also, I am perilously close to 500 fans. So I think I will reward my 500th and then 1000th fan with something from the prize cabinet at work. Why not?!

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Dinah Shore Bitches!

It is that time of year again. The time when all the crazy lesbians of the world descend on Palm Springs, CA for the biggest party of the year. DINAH SHORE! You know I can't turn down the opportunity to play with a bunch of half naked sexy ladies. So I will be there! But I won't be alone because this year we are doing a special LIVE broadcast from Dinah Shore at The Riviera. This is going to be an extra special DNR show because the DNR stands for Doria and Romaine!!

I would like to encourage all the listeners to join us on Friday, April 3rd from 3-7pm at The Riviera for our special show. We will have celesbian guests stopping by and perhaps a few games to play.

Check out all the events that are planned for the weekend at Club Skirts. More information coming soon!

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

R Family Vacations

Okay, so I promised a blog entry on last night's show and here we go....

LAst night we made and exciting announcement on the show. You may recall that last year we were invited by Rosie to come aboard the R Family Cruise that traveled up the New England states and into Canada. The whole show jumped at the opportunity to see what the trip was all about. We recorded 2 shows on the boat and sent them back to the studios to be replayed later in the week. Neither Derek nor I knew what to expect when we boarded the boat. I knew I was in for a "Family" adventure I wouldn't soon forget because I had Iris and a 1 year old Romie with me. Derek got on the boat as a single gay man worried about fitting in with a bunch of family types. And Mistress Sam got on as one of the few straight women on the boat, well so she thought.

Once aboard we soon realized that it didn't matter if you were gay, straight, single, coupled or had kids or not. Everyone on the boat was there to have a good time and boy did they ever! 

Check out a few pictures from last year's trip!
That's Romie with Ross Matthew's!
Derek and I in our first few minutes on the boat. Don't we look happy?
Iris, Romie and I on top of some dumb mountain. Iris made me go. 
Here we are getting ready to do the show on the boat!

If you have listened to the show at all for the last year you have heard me say time and time again I would be getting on the R Family Cruise again this year no matter what! Well, it seems that the whole show will be going again!! We will be recording 2 shows live on the boat for listeners who are aboard. Listeners at home will get to hear them later that week. This cruise is an Alaska cruise that leaves from Seattle. I can't wait!! They are doing early bird specials on the R Family website right now so if you are looking for a fun week this summer you should totally consider joining us! I promise it is an adventure you won't soon forget!
-Romaine

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Finnegan's Rainbow!

Comedian Christian Finnegan was on the show yesterday and he was great. I only wish I had more energy. I was fighting a cold and even went home five minutes early to make sure I could get to bed and get some rest.

Well, the cold won today so I am doing the show from home. I could have gone in but I just would have ended up making Romaine and Sam and Greg and Intern Luis sick. So better to look like a character in a NyQuil commerical at home. Plus I didn't want to miss Luis's sex question for The Dildo Whisperer later on.

And no, I will NOT be on the webcam in the Derek and Romaine chat room tonight. You are out of your mind for even asking!

Monday, March 9, 2009

I got to talk to BEN PATRICK JOHNSON!!!

I was so nervous, I sounded like I was reading my questions but I was really just insane with nervousness!

I loved hearing him on today's show - it was the most bizarre experience after hearing the "Ben Bot" all the time - hearing him as an actual person was a little bit mind boggling.

But, after a while it did seem like he was just a normal person, with normal issues. I'm going to go buy all of his books now. Fascinated!

What did you guys think?

(Also, early on in the show as DnR were going ON and ON about crappy restaurants, I fell a little bit in love with Jared when he called and asked them why they had such bad taste. I give him the virtual "anti-dialtone" for daring to call them on that - YAY! ALTHOUGH: because of DnR I have enjoyed the Deliciousness that is WAFFLE HOUSE!)

Friday, March 6, 2009

Get Involved!

We have appreciated all of the listeners who participated in the missions to get the word out about the show over the past few weeks. It has all been an amazing success. We are getting tons of emails and calls to the show from new listeners on XM (as well as SIRIUS). It is great to see our listeners be so enthusiastic about the show, and we want to encourage you to be just as enthusiastic in other positive ways out in the world.

Earlier this week, a listener named Jason in Bakersfield, CA wrote to me with concern about a local AIDS services organization called "Ricky's Retreat." The building they have been using for years is facing foreclosure and they are trying to raise money to buy the building and save this vital local organization. They will take all donations or offers of help, big or small, so visit their website www.bakersfieldaidsproject.org for more information.

Then last night, I got an update from my sexy and altruistic friend Barton Brooks who is in the midst of his 52 week tour around the world helping people in developing countries. Barton has been on the show a few times and Romaine has even been pushing for us to date! But you can't very well date someone who is half way around the world, so that notion will need to be tabled for the time being. However, you can donate, big and small, to his effects as he trots the globe. His strategy in a nutshell: visit localities in the developing world, find out what they need (clean water, school supplies, a boat) and then get that for them. It is a very localized, community by community strategy (sometimes house to house), unlike the one size fits all programs that many other non-profits deliver. Plus, you can read through his blog and when he has a project you might like to help fund or help fund, just write to him and tell him how you want to help. Frankly, it's pretty cool. Check it out now at www.guerrillaaid.com.

I know times are tough and we are already asking for your $12.95 each month to listen to our filthy mess of a show. Now the non-profits of the world are facing a real crisis these days, especially with so many corporate sponsors pulling back on their funding. So even if it is a little, it can make a difference. We appreciate you listening to the show and we appreciate you helping to make the world better for others when you can. Thanks!

Monday, March 2, 2009

Snow Day

There is a huge blizzard on the east coast and not the kind you get at the Dairy Queen (unfortunately). It is fluffy and white and beautiful outside my house, but also windy and treacherous. So really it's like a drunk drag queen confronting you at a bar for interrupting her show. All wonderful and terrible at the same time. For some reason, this reminds me that Hedda Lettuce is on the show this week. Anyway, I love looking out the window on days like this. It's so Currier and Ives, but going anywhere is a problem. They have cleared the roads a few times but the wind and snow never stop and it looks ten minutes later like civilization ceased completely in the last century. Oh well. Guess we are doing the show from home.

So since it is a snow day, those of you new to the show get to experience Romaine and I using our home studios. We have these studios just in case of a day like this though we have never both been away at the same time. This will be a real test of the quality of our show. Please call in a lot at 866 305 6887 and save us from ourselves! Then again, it is Monday so we should have lots to talk about. Last night's amazing Amazing Race. Battlestar Galactica from Friday, along with another improved episode of Dollhouse (do you think we watch too much TV?) I also finally got around to watching the Heather Locklear Lifetime movie "Flirting With Forty," which is really the kind of movie being a shut-in was designed for.

And what have you been doing with your weekend? Call the show and tell us. If you don't feel the weekend was sufficiently fun, or you are worried about the quality of tonight's show, check out this clip from the ever expanding audio files of Richard Nixon where he reviews the gay episode of "All In The Family" and then goes off on an insanely sensational rant about homosexuality in America that just tickled the crap out of me. Being trapped inside my house with nothing to do but watch TV, I can sympathize with what it must be like to be President.

On Strike

I'm sure you've been wondering why there is no (new) Derek & Romaine blather on this site. It's because I was waiting for Derek to change my login.

So until he does, I'm on strike! I'm not talking about how there are a bunch of new listeners who just discovered DnR - and are mildly confused about exactly WHAT they talk about for 4 hours. Or about how listeners had to call up and defend their sanity to DnR and the greater audience. Or about how listeners are frankly, appalled by Romaine gloating about her HUGE and ridiculous tax return.

What? Too LAZY? Derek & Romaine? Nuh-uh. Unpossible!