Monday, December 19, 2011

Holiday Cocktails with Mixologist Duane Fernandez Jr.

Hey Bitches, Tonight on Derek & Romaine, the faboulous Duane Fernandez Jr., stops by our studio to share some of his favorite Holiday Cocktails. We have provided some of the recipes below so you to can prepare them at home. Tune in tonight on SiriusXM 108 OutQ 6-10pm ET/3-7pm PT. Happy Holidays!!

You can also follow Mixologist Duane Fernandez Jr. on Twitter: @Urbancocktail for more drink recipes!

The Yuletide Fresca

1 ½ oz. Tequila Avión Silver

¾ oz. St. Germaine

½ oz. Lime Juice

½ oz. Cranberry & Rosemary Syrup

Top with Sparkling Wine

Combine all ingredients (except sparkling wine) in a shaker with ice; strain into a champagne flute and top with sparkling wine. Garnish with a cranberry and rosemary stem.

46 Days of Christmas

2 oz. Maker’s 46

½ oz. Snap Ginger Spirit

½ oz. Vermouth

1 Heaping Bar Spoon Golden Fig Jam

2 Dashes Bitters

Combine all ingredients in a shaker with ice; strain into a martini glass. Garnish with fig and orange zest.

Winter Wonderland

2 oz. Pisco Portón

1 oz. Eggnog

¼ oz. Cinnamon & Nutmeg Syrup

2 Heaping Bar Spoons Coco Lopez
Combine all ingredients in a shaker with ice; strain over ice into a short rocks glass and garnish with a candy cane.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011


Fabulous Katie joined in on the fun last night!

This week we've welcomed resident New Yorkers who make this city fabulous!

Last night I snapped some photos of our lovely guests.    While uploading them, I crossed my fingers, hoping that had I taken decent pics - otherwise, I could just hear Derek wanting to know why I can't even take a fucking picture ... and Romaine breaking out the paddle once reserved for Bobby The Intrern, and chrsitening my ass with his initials.  (That's the closest that Finally-Got-Some-Dick-Bobby-The-Bottom-Intern would ever get to my ass!)  Which reminds me, I wonder if he's the same Bobby that keeps sending me friend requests on FaceBook?  Doesn't that mother fucker realize that his ability to send multiple requests, means I'm declining him more than all those credit cards he keeps apply for?  But if Bobby is cute and has managed to retain a tight pussy, maybe I'd fuck him and instead of dowloading DNR pics, I'd be sending those pics to his imbred boyfriend.

BTW, does anyone around this place empty the fucking files in the show camera?  (They should never have let me get my hands on this camera!)  I don't think all of these pictures were of "guests," especially the one that appears to be a blurry self-inspection/close-up of Bobby's anal warts.  Besides taking pics of his
open ass, it looks like the former intern occassionally used the camera for show purposes.  I'll share a couple that caught my attention ...

I was living for this one!  I love me some Jackie Collins ... there is no shame in her game.  I  think Romaine should be the inspiration for her next book, Dangerous Dildo Whispers ...

Speaking of tawdry tales, I bet these hotties from the Ascension Party have enough Fire Island stories to fill two or three Jackie novels! For some reason the only words that come to mind are DOUBLE PENETRATION.  I'm wondering if Derek has an interesting story to share?

Yep, he definitely has a story to share ...

All this drama and dick has me sidetracked.  Back to last night-

The handsome gentleman, Jerry of Suenos visited the show and Chef Sue Torres made sure we had plenty of mouth watering cuisine from her fabulous progressive Mexican restuarant.  I'm thinking about tasting the Jerry's "Real Deal" Margarita ... and not the one on the menu, okay???

The Big Ol' Queens (a.k.a. Douglas Quint & Bryan Petroff) from the Big Gay Ice Cream Shop were also here last night and made sure that we didn't have plenty of mouth watering desserts from the shop.  Can somebody please tell them to hell with the goddamn T-shirts!  We wanted fucking ice cream and desserts ... the last thing any of us needed was
another goddamn cum rag!  (I think we should order carry out and not fucking pay)

Last but not least, Emeric Harney from Harney & Sons Fine Teas stopped by and discussed all things tea.
Romaine impressed him with her vast knowledge of tea.  It's a good thing he brought gifts or she would have pressed him harder than that last batch of tea he made.  Oh, by the way, let me give you the 'T' on that visit ... multiple people in our studio wanted a private, shale we say, tasting, of all the tea Emeric had to offer!

Aww, look at Romaine ready for tea in a fancy Betty cup

Until next time, bitches-
Eric The Intern

Monday, October 31, 2011

Print and Save

Dear Adolescent Eric,
We both believe that, like astral projection, time travel is possible; so this letter shouldn’t come as any surprise to you.  Think back to the Land of the Lost re-runs we used to watch on Saturday mornings.  Remember the episode in which Holly Marshall met her older-self?  I’m suddenly reminded of another episode where Holly called Chaka the primate dumb.  The next day, we referred to everyone in Sunday School as being dumb.  Of course our Sunday School teacher ratted us out to Grandma.  When she lovingly advised us that Jesus wouldn’t call anyone dumb, our four year old self proudly responded with, “Grandma, Jesus would if the person was really fucking dumb.”  Grandma shook her head and went to the kitchen to make Tollhouse cookies; blissfully in denial that her four year old grandson had no problem dropping the F-Bomb.   
Eric, young people often need advice, and although they never seem to take it, I’ll do as any elder would and offer us a few words of wisdom …
Above anything else that I could possibly ever offer as advice to you throughout our journey in this lifetime, are these simple words: Do Not Regret The Decisions We Make
Our decisions; good, bad, wise or misguided, will enhance our future incarnate lives.
Let’s get our coming-out discussion out of the way …
I loved that when we told our mom we were gay she said, “Honey, we all knew you were a queen.  We were just waiting for you to take your throne.” We then went to the mall and bought a whole bunch of Swatch watches.  Save those watches, especially the Keith Haring Swatch mom bought you, it’ll be worth a good amount of cash one day.
I know you're still on Cloud 9 after just having lost our virginity to a really cute boy.  The sex was amazing, wasn’t it?  I totally wasn’t ready for your orgasm to co-inside with Linda Lavin singing the theme song to Alice!  While I agree that it was important to leave the television on so that no one would hear us having sex, thank God Apple will reinvent the way we listen to music.  That way there will always be a soundtrack during our lovemaking.  But never forget how happy you were in that moment, lying next to him,  laughing about him busting his load to Flo saying, “Mel … kiss my grits!”   
We’ve always been a bit of a gypsy throughout our many lives.  Please continue this attribute throughout your journey as Eric.  Eventually, you and I will find the place we’ve always looked for in our final incarnate self.  Stock up on packing tape, the art of getting the best deal at U-Haul and convincing your parents that they should take their next vacation during the same time you need help moving all your shit to the next fabulous new city!
Continue to take comfort in humor and the written word, for they will always be our greatest strength, our ally, and our comfort.  As people vanish or simply become emotionally and physically unavailable, our humor and writing will live on.  Humor will allow us the medium to process the events that happen in this lifetime.  You’ll encounter many jobs, many professions, BUT writing will eventually pay your mortgage and make work seem like a land of fantasy.  
Continue to smile, for it replenishes an exhausted soul and radiates another human being when they least expect it.  I know we'll worry about laugh lines, but in the future, someone invents a readily available injection that will shed a few years here and there.  Trust me, you’re going to be an avid researcher on ways to beat the clock.
When the time arrives for our grandparents to end their journey, celebrate the intangible gifts they’ve bestowed upon you.  Continue to record all of the funny times you share together … and don’t throw away any cassettes or VHS tapes that capture the practical jokes you’ve played on them. I know there are moments when we cry with the thought of losing them.  Do not.  They have travelled with you many lifetimes.
I'm at what is known as an internet café.  This is where I’m creating this message and my prepaid card is up.  Yes, being shaken down for money never goes away in any lifetime!  The manager is giving me the evil eye, so I better get this to you.  She looks as if she could pull the plug quicker than the electric company shut off the power in our first apartment because we thought it was included in the rent.
Never lose our inner child.  He’s four years old and although he may be a hot mess, he fuels our creativity and we love him.  16 is one hellacious year of hair experimentation, so I'm sending you a pic of our 4 year old self ... as not to remind you of whatever latest creation you're living to regret!

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Dear Me

Dear Kingston,

Age 16

You're probably heading home from school right now after having a miserable day. Nothing makes you happier than being home with your mom and little brother ,dancing around the house to some Bruce Springsteen. When your at school your pretend to be someone your not just so you can be liked by everyone. You put on a smile to the world but your dying inside because you just want people to like you for who you are. But you know if people see the real you, your going to end up with no friends. Just be yourself and don't give a fuck what people think of you. Your going to make so many friends that will love you for who you are. Life is beautiful my friend. So here are some words of widsom that will hopefully make things easier for you

1) When you turn 18, you will recieve your first credit card. DO NOT USE IT!  Your going to get carried away and end up $8000 in debt. -____-

2) A girl is going to ask you to prom and your going to tell her to meet you at the Burger King. You never show up.  Don't be a dickhead and go with her, she turns out to be a model. Not that it matters anyway since your gay, but still!

3) Don't join sports becuase your friends are all in them. Follow your heart, if you want to be part of the math league, go for it. Who cares if they judge you.

4) Never leave home without telling your family you love them, you never know when's the last day you're going to seem them. Your only regret now at 23years old, is not going to see your grandma as much, because you thought she was never going to pass away. She died this August and you regret not telling her how much you love her

5) Your friends are going to continue asking you to do drugs. I know you are contemplating it, but dont give in. Just so you know, Brian is in jail for 5 years, Seth is in probation and works at Burger King, and Michelle is going to rehab. Don't end up like them.

6) I know your constantly stressing because you see mom crying every night, trying to figure out how she is going to pay tomorrow's rent. Mom is doing just fine and she bought her own house and car. Your going to be very proud of her.

7) Your going to go through so many heartbreaks, so just hold on tight

8)When you come out of the closet,  many of your "friends" are going to turn their backs on you. Don't worry ,those who matter will embrace you.

9)You can do anything you set your mind to. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise

So with that all said, your going to go through some good times and some not so good times.I know your not going to take any of this advice, and that's perfectly fine. Make mistakes and learn from them, they are what make you who you are. Everything in life happens for a reaso and i'm glad your going to go through the stuff you do. Keep your head up buddy.



P.S  I know you hate the name Christian, but in a few years you're going to regret being called Kingston

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Derek's Dear Me Letter

A Letter To My Sixteen Year Old Self
Derek at Sixteen

Greetings from twenty-five years in the future. Freaky right? It’s just like that writing assignment you had a couple of years ago where you had to write a letter to yourself in twenty years. Sad news. Most of the relatives you said I should look up are dead now so instead of putting in a letter to call them, maybe you should just call them now while you can. I know long distance is expensive but that will change. Everything about calling will change. And the easier and cheaper it gets to call people, the less you will want to do it. Weird right? Sometimes life doesn’t make a lot of sense.

There are things that will disappoint you. We don’t live on the moon and robot butlers haven’t happened either. You will have a robot dog though but the novelty will wear out before the battery does. Pretty much nothing in Back To The Future II happens. They did make the sneakers finally but that was never interesting anyway. In 2001, Pan Am will be out of business and in 2010, you won’t live in a house with dolphins as pets. Frankly, the best invention we get out of science fiction is automatic doors and they’re everywhere and you’re going to love them.

I don’t really have a lot of advice for you. Things have turned out pretty good so far, with only a couple of minor exceptions. You are a lucky person with good instincts. Follow them and be bold and you’ll do great. You could change things but you’ll be happy with the way things turn out even if you don’t. But I suppose I have some minor suggestions that might improve the quality of your overall experience.

1. Your tortured teen love for Laurel Cullen is a phase. You like guys. You should quite moping and listening to Madonna songs because the hot male date you bring to your ten year high school reunion will make her wild with jealousy.

2. Stop making faces in the mirror trying to see what you will look like when you get older. Trust me, you’ll get plenty of that when you are older. Enjoy being young. Even though you will be frustrated that people won’t take you seriously at work because you have a baby face, getting carded in your 30s is a lot more fun than a corner office.

3. Having a boyfriend is not important. Making money is. It will turn out over time that you will like the security of cash in the bank more than the security of a man on your arm. So, shamelessly pursue your career instead of men who will only waste your time and steal your energy. And as a TV show in the future will point out, “with enough money, you can pay people to see you naked.”

4. When your Mom tells you to “do something nice for some nice lesbian couple somewhere” by donating to a sperm bank when you are 22, don’t be mortified, just take her advice. Yes, you will probably be a grandfather in your 40s, but in retrospect, having grandkids at any age is awesome and even though you will miss changing diapers and shaping their lives, there will still be little Derek’s running around somewhere with Denis’ chin and your Mom’s long limbs and ski jump nose.

5. Don’t be afraid to move to New York City. You are going to love it. Although you are right, there will never be enough money to live there properly, no matter how rich you are.

6. I know Peggy Sue Got Married doesn’t make any sense to you now, but in twenty years, that shit is going to wreck you. Lots of movies and other things will make more sense when you are older. Yes, it seems obnoxious that Glinda doesn’t just let Dorothy go home at the beginning of the Wizard of Oz, but an arduous journey is more valuable than an easy trip to where you want to go. If you don’t learn along the way, you’ll just end up a Republican.

7. Your fight with your Dad may seem like it is about other things but it is just about you being gay. Get over it and tell him. It will turn out to be the best thing. In fact, come out in high school. Nothing bad is going to happen and I assure you there won’t be one shocked face in a ten mile radius. Not even Laurel.

8. Stop resisting technology. It is going to end up defining your career again and again and again. The more you resist it, the less money you will end up making. And as you can see in #3, money is kind of important. And writing too. Don’t resist that either. You like it. Do more of that.

9. Don’t try to be trendy or wear fashionable clothes. You are the embodiment of American sportswear. Stick with what works for you. Otherwise you will just end up looking ridiculous. Although, it turns out that what other people think doesn’t really matter but still, you will know you look ridiculous and not in a good way.

10. People are stupid. You are just going to have to let that go. Be happy instead, and grateful that you aren’t stupid too. And your hair. Be grateful for that. Even though it has already started going grey, like everything else in your life, you’ll still end up having more than you’ll ever need. And if I know myself, that will be a relief.

This Dear Me letter is inspired by the book Dear Me: A Letter to My Sixteen-Year-Old Self.

Amber's Dear Me Letter

(I'm on the left)

October 25, 2011

Dear 16 Year Old Me,

Heads up kiddo it's 1999 you're in high school, Emily's mother has somewhat recently forbid you from seeing each other and you pretty much thought the world was over, well I've got news from you it isn't and things will settle and you'll find more happiness than you thought possible in the years ahead.

I know you believe you're an artist but your constantly frustrated with your inability to finish a project that's worthwhile, well I have good news, you are an artist you just haven't found your medium yet but when you do it will offer great satisfaction though not without challenges and frustrations of its own. They're worth it.

Don't force things, especially in the relationship department there is no need to rush. You will have many relationships, be honest with yourself and your partners I promise it will cause less heartache in the end.

Listen to mom, I know she seems over protective and nags you a lot but seriously she's right about pretty much all of that stuff and you'll soon realize how lucky you are to have her.

Take lots of pictures and write in a journal (you won't write enough but you should!) life might seem to drag on now but mark my words every year goes faster than the last and before you know it you'll be 28 years old thinking holy crap I can't believe it's almost November 2011. Seriously just remember as much as you can, be good to your friends, call your family, tell them you love them.

If you happen to hear from 50 year old me please forward the message, I'd love to hear what she has to say.


This Dear Me letter is inspired by the book Dear Me: A Letter to My Sixteen-Year-Old Self.

Dear Romaine...

So last night on the DNR show we had Joseph on our show. He put together the book, Dear Me. It is a book of letters from celebrities to their 16 y/o selves. So as a home work assignment I thought it would be a good idea for the DNR crew to write their own "Dear Me" letters. Below is the letter I would send to my 16 y/o self. 

Romaine on her 16th Birthday! 

October 25, 2011

Dear Romaine,

Yep, it is freaky. You are getting a letter from your 33 year old self. I know you dream of being the age I am right now but girl you have a lot of life to live first and I have a little advice to give you to help guide the way.

Okay, so you are 16 and just got laid for the first time. Enjoy your time with her. She is a special one and you will always love her. But she is just the first of many women you love and as much as you hate it your mother is right about her.  Betty will try you many times over the years but I promise you that she will become the most important person in your life. Remember she loves you no matter what dumb ass shit she might say to you. You will be there for Betty and she will always be there for you. Your parents will come around but your time with them is limited so don’t spend it not loving them. And when you need help ask. They will never let you down. Oh and write down some of dad’s songs and crazy sayings…they really are funny. 

High school sucks. Yep, but don’t spend so much time worrying about what those dumb ass kids think. You will have the last laugh. Focus on the things you are good at and they will take you far. Always take the high road when dealing with those who push you to your limits. Know who your enemies are and keep your allies close. You are not alone even if you feel that way now. High school doesn’t matter in the big scheme of things so just get through it.

Michael—I know you are struggling with him being sick and I know you are scared. Enjoy every moment you share with him. There will be a time in the very near future where you will wish for just one more visit. Ask him every question about life you have and pay attention to the answers. Michael is perhaps the wisest person you will ever know. Tell him you love him often and make sure he knows how much he means to you. He is scared too. Tell Michael that his life has made your life better now and in the future. Let him know that through you he will fulfill his final goal in life (it the goal that is hanging on the mirror in his bathroom).

Take more pictures. That scrapbook you keep will become one of your most cherished things. So fill it with pictures and stories.  Write down all the lessons you learn from Michael. Trust me you will want to remember the coming years of your life. You are in for a real ride kid.  

I know you want to become famous. Don’t let anyone ever tell you that you can’t do it. YOU CAN DO ANYTHING YOU PUT YOUR MIND TO. You know it and I am here to tell you it is true. Your voice is the key so keep finding it.

Things are going to take turns you don’t expect. So try to remember to be true to the person you are. There will be some real challenges ahead but all of those challenges make you stronger and more capable then most. Remember that you are good and want to do good things with your life. When the opportunity to do the right thing presents itself always do the right thing!

When you get to NYC and you will…there will be a girl. When you meet her don’t be afraid to tell her you love her if you don't you will regret it. She won’t want to hear it but she needs to know. Remind her often.

Always set goals for yourself and then push until you meet them. Never give up on those goals. They will be the key to having a fulfilling life.

Last but not least. You are surrounded with love. Your family is amazing. There aren’t many families as unique as yours. Get to know those siblings of yours. One day they will be more important than they seem now. Make sure you tell them you love them often.

Romaine, your life is going to be amazing but you already know that.

Always and 33,

I think I was 18 in this one.

Thursday, October 20, 2011


Tuesday night, our lovely boss, Amber ... sent myself and Christian to Times Square to play the infamous Penny Can game.  (Amber conveniently forgot to inform me that Christian doesn't know how to decipher cross-walk signs.  Jesus Christ, they have fucking pictures and he still gets confused?)

As soon as we exited the elevator, Intern Christian started bitching that he wanted a Subway sandwich.  To hell with his Cold Cut Combo, I was ready to shove a goodamn Fleshlight Zombie® dildo down his throat.  I was still furious with the juice incident, therefore, I completely ignored his hunger pains.  Let me back track for a moment:  Before leaving the building, I asked Christian to bring me a juice.  Why did this Chrissy Snow come back with a goddamn Hawaiian Punch?  I was completely dumbfounded that he actually believed that Hawaiian Punch was fruit juice!  I had a total bipolar moment in front of Sirius security.  But thinking back, what bothers me more than Christian's mishap, is the fact that the security guard found my Mommie Dearest moment to be completely natural here at Sirius.  He didn't even bother to look up from his Sudoko during the whole fucking episode ...

Will someone PLEASE explain to Christian that the ghetto-ass Hawaiian fruit punch they put in his bottle in place of Vitamin D milk ... IS NOT 100% real fruit juice???

I continued to ignore his whining for a Subway sandwich.  We turned the corner and before our very eyes was the wonderful world of dirty, grungy, unauthorized mascots!  Mickey Mouse, Hello Kitty, Spider-Man and the Super Mario Brothers to name a few!  Spider-man managed to play with us before their pimp, who was recently paroled from serving time for sodomy, larceny and grand theft auto, informed us that our Penny Can was fucking with his territory.

We got the hell out of there!  Who wants to be raped by some thug while being held down by Hello Kitty?

By the way, Spider-Man missed his shot, and per the rules of our dysfunctional Penny Can game, I was allowed to ask him an embarrassing question.  Well, doesn't every gay man want to know if their superhero is actually packing some major cock in those tights?  Spidey confirmed that he was indeed HUNG.  My eyes glanced at his package and there was a stain.

Our paths then crossed with a troll named Jeremiah.  He may have had a biblical name, but this dude lost religion right about the same time he lost his virginity-and I suspect it happened in the back of a Ford Econoline Van or a tent at a church camp meeting.  Jeremiah had this aura and stench about him, as if he had just left one of the adult bookstores that feature a movie & cum dump.  But he was willing to play Penny Can and it was fun torturing him!  His wrist had more limp than a hillbilly with gout, so needless to say, our Penny Can runneth over.

Before heading back to the studio, Christian thought it would be a good idea to take Penny Can into a gay bar.  That bitch knows where every gay bar is within a 4 block radius of Sirius, so we went to the Ritz.  There I was, minding my own business when Christian stumbled across one of his gentleman callers.  Let's just say that Anna Nicole Smith wasn't the only one doing a geriatric on a respirator ...

While Christian was securing his November rent and Metro card, I met two drunk messes on the porch.  Obviously, they missed their Alcoholics Anonymous meeting and decided to get drunk at 4 o' clock in the afternoon.  Suprisingly, they still managed a good aim!  They were adorable yet deplorable and wanted to know if bathroom sex from Christian was one of their door prizes ... need I say more?  Christian does do as he's told and the winners got more than they bargained for!

We went back to the studio and had a great time with Derek and Romaine.  We even got to play on-air and ended the evening with a lot of fun and laughter!  For a brief, fleeding moment, I actually liked Christian ... that is until he text me in the middle of the night asking what he should do about the guy he vomited on during a moment of passion.

That's all for now, folks!
-Eric The Intern    

Thursday, October 6, 2011


Before I post my entry, I should probably acknowledge a devoted DNR listener, Gay Grandpa.  Not only is he a hot mess - he's a man somewhere between dementia and death.  Anyway, this old codger took to our blog and instigated drama between myself and Intern Christian!  Don't shit in your Depends, Grandpa ... I know exactly what I'm dealing with.  I've also managed to learn a thing or two by watching All About Eve down at Chelsea Cinema on many o' Thursday night.  Fortunately, Hedda Lettuce doesn't rotate her films as often as Christian turns tricks, therefore, I'm well aware of Eve Harrington, otherwise known as Intern Christian.

My very wise German grandma once warned me about guys like Christian.  She said,
"Eddick, daahlink.  Rememberz what Grammy sayz.  When zu go to zee buffet, neverz diptz your carrotz in ze diptz unlezz you vere firstz in zee linez."

FUCK ME for not taking that internship across the hall at Martha Stewart.  At least I'd be hashing up Peony potpourri instead of shoveling through all Christian's bullshit.  But I love Derek and Romaine (and Christian) AND I'd really get fucking tired of having to continually hear Martha say, "It's A Good Thing." I just thought about something concerning Gay Grandpa:  When the hell did nursing homes start subscribing to SiriusXM?  Furthermore, how the hell did he stay up past 5:00pm when everyone knows the nurses dope those motherfuclers up real good as not to miss Young & The Restless on Tivo!

Now on to my entry ...

We've all had our awkward moments in the workplace bathroom.  For instance, like my first week of interning- I had the pleasure of standing at a urinal next to someone affectionately known around here as Cupcake.  From what I saw, they should be calling him 9"x 6" Cake Pan.  That's one hung straight boy!  On to my most recenter bathroom encounter ... there I was, minding my own business in the SiriusXM bathroom.  As I began washing my hands, I heard what sounded like a sound byte to a Michael Lucas film.  With all the groaning and oohs and aahhs, you would've thought I was in an elementary Spanish class learning vowels.

It was late, right before show time, so my initial thought was that Intern Christian took it to heart when Derek and Romaine told us to make ourselves feel right at home.  (God knows he's been doing it on the air)  It was a logical thought: Christian had just packaged a Fleshjack and maybe he decided to try it out before dropping it in the mail?  But no, this wasn't the simple moans of a J/O, these were groans of deep anal pleasure!

It was just me and the that sinful bottom in the stall, so I couldn't resist to take a look at the coffee cup and e-mail print out he had left at the sink.  Random thoughts raced through my mind ... What in the fuck was he doing in thereWas he taking a confessionWas he performing an exorcismWas the e-mail correspoindence casualy left on the sink, an invitation to meet him after the show?  I guess I've watched one too many episodes of CSI!

Heaven help me---this is a case of the BUSTED ASS! 

Monday, October 3, 2011

Christian the Intern!!!

Hello Everyone!   :)

My name is Christian and I am one of the new interns for The Derek and Romaine Show. I started September 19th and so far I am loving it here. The entire DNR staff is very friendly, helpful, and funny as shit.  I am very grateful to be interning here and keeping all of you guys up to date on whats going on in the show as well as hearing from all of you.

Before I start of telling you about myself, let me tell you a little about what happened to me this weekend. Hopefully you all had a better time than I did. The guy I was dating dumped me on Friday because he " realized I wasn't his type". Having feelings for someone that doesn't feel the same way about you sucks, let me tell you that. I think part of it was due to the fact that I wouldnt have sex with him -___-. So let me take this oppurtunity to send him a big fuck you and tell him he's an idiot! But anyway Saturday night I went to Industry in NYC to help heal this broken heart and Sunday morning I woke up on the side of a NYC building with  a hangover, bite marks on my lips, no shoes , no money to get home and  I ended up missing work. I think I went a little to hard!

So now that I let that out, let me introduce myself. I am a senior at Fairleigh Dickinson University studying Communications and Advertisement.  My dream job is to be a television host and producde my own drama series (I promise they will be better than all the corny shows ABC is releasing). Some of  my hobbies include playing lacrosse, sailing, playing with my puppy Kingston, drinking beers with my fraternity brothers, interning at the show, and meeting new people. I grew up in a farm so working in NYC is very interesting and a bit of a culture shock for me. I'm used to seeing chickens and  cows, not bums and crazy people. Well the show is about to start soon so I have to run now.  I look forward to hearing from all of you!

P.S Eric and I will be formally introducing ourselves on air tomorrow night on Derek & Romaine. Join us ;)


Christian the Intern

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

X BOX 360 with DEREK and ROMAINE!

Hi Bitches!

My name is Eric, a new DNR intern ... and although I won't be in sunny California, I'll unfortunately have the pleasure of picking up Derek's laundry, cleaning out Romaine's garage and dusting her damn Vinylmation collection ...

So after a half hour of being cock-blocked by security, I am now happily working side-by-side Romaine to update our show blog.  Remind me to tell you the hell I went through to get into the building today.  I've smuggled a dildo in my carry-on easier than what it took me to go through Sirius security.

For EVERYONE lucky enough to have some fun with Derek & Romaine, here's the info you'll need to kick their asses at XBOX!  Join them in a game of GEARS OF WAR 3 and get your revenge for being hung-up on by one of the fucking new interns.

Meet Derek and Romaine at the G3 Miracle Lounge in lovely West Hollywood!

Tuesday, September 27th at 4PM PT
Note to players
Get ready because he definitely knows a thing or two about military men.  You might wanna bring your fucking best!

Tuesday, September 27th at 5pm PT
Note to victims
Play at your own risk.  This bitch is good and with all that sexual frustration she had last week, well, let's just say you'll be devoured as quickly as the center of Iris' apple pie!

For more info on kicking their asses and the XBOX challenge, log onto GAMING AND GIVING FOR GOOD

Okay, I'm done for today, bitches.  Derek's got me inventorying the prize packs and porn collection.  WHAT the fuck are these bitches doing or WHO the fuck are they doing ... because they got more porn that an out-of-business adult book store after the Giuliani Times Square clean up!

Friday, September 23, 2011

Gay Days Anaheim (DISNEYLAND) Schedule and Details! Sept. 30-Oct. 1

Here's the DNR weekend schedule. 

9/30 Friday- DNR Live from House of Blues, Downtown Disney 2:30-8pm Drop by the upstairs patio at The House of Blues. Romaine will have a special Vinylmation TRADING BOX at the broadcast so bring her a vinyl and trade with her. (See details below) The show will be live from 3-7pm but stick around after the show to chat one on one with Derek and Romaine! Guests Include: Fan favorite Michelle Collins, A Vinylmation Expert, A Disney Hall of Fame Cast Member, Eddie Shapiro, and Oscar Winner Dustin Lance Black.

11pm: Listener Cocktail Hour at the Hearth Stone Bar inside the Grand Californian Hotel. Come grab a night cap with the DNR crew. 

10/1 Saturday- DNR at Disneyland for Gay Days Anaheim
10:45-11am - Join Derek and Romaine and other Gay Days visitors at the Mark Twain Riverboat meet-up in the morning. Don't be late! The DNR boat leaves at 11 sharp. 
3pm-3:15pm Join Derek and Romaine for an afternoon meet up in Tomorrowland outside the Pizza Port. 
9pm-1am Dance the night away with DNR at Kingdom dance party at House of Blues

(see Romaine hid the Details down here so Derek doesn't cry)
Romaine was able to get a special Vinylmation Trading box from her friend "Head of Vinylmation Guy". Not only did he give her a special trading box to trade with all you bitches but he loaded it full of really special and hard to get figures. Oh and Romaine even created a few (hand painted) of her own just for you. So if you want to trade vinyls with Romaine bring a Vinylmation figure with you to the live broadcast at the House of Blues. Want to trade but don't have any Vinylmations yet? No worries, D Street the main store for all things Vinylmation is located about 200 Feet from the House of Blues so you can just swing by and grab a Vinylmation on your way to the show! Not sure what to buy? Don't worry Romaine has made you a list!!!
Astrological Vinylmations
Oh Mickey Vinylmations
Occupation Vinylmations
Celebration Vinylmations
Pirates of the Caribbean
Flag Vinylmations

Romaine Can't WAIT to trade with all of you bitches and share her love of Vinylmations. 

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Farewell from Katy the Intern =(

So today is a sad day for me because it's my final day as an intern here with Derek and Romaine.  I wish I could stay here and be a part of the DNR show, but unfortunately all good things must come to an end.

I learned wayyyy more than I ever expected to on my first day here back in January.  Not only did I learn a multitude of things regarding the logistics of working on a radio show, I also learned a lot about sexuality, politics, and celebrity gossip!  I got to work on the Alan Ball Iconography and True Blood special which was extremely exciting because not every intern gets to work on projects as big as those and when I hear someone talk about it, I can proudly say that I was a part of that.

I got to meet sooooo many awesome people!  From porn stars to comedians to drag queens, I was introduced to such a unique and exciting conglomeration of celebrities.  My favorite will always be Hedda Lettuce even though she yelled at me last week to get her coffee!!  (It was actually hilarious)  Not to mention, I was surrounded by so many sexy men and even a ton of equally sexy women!  That was a total bonus ;)

More importantly, I established such an amazing bond with everyone here.  I'll always have a special place in my heart for Derek, Romaine, Amber, Katie, iShaq, and Chanel.  I'm really going to miss working with everybody here because this didn't feel like work at all; it was more like doing/learning really cool things under the guidance of some really incredible mentors =)

While it SUCKS (and not in a good way =P) that I won't be here with Derek and Romaine, they won't have time to forget about me because starting next week, I'll be back and right down the hall because I got a job call screening for the metal journalist legend Eddie Trunk on Monday nights!!!  This internship really opened up SOOOO many doors full of opportunity and I am seriously so lucky and blessed to have been chosen to be a part of this!!

I'm so glad that when I got the call about being an intern here at Sirius XM, I chose Derek and Romaine.  I didn't know who they were or what I was getting into, but once I heard the words "really raunchy and dirty" I knew that's the show I wanted to work with!  I wouldn't change a thing about the choices I made because in the end I know that this was the right one.

So I sadly say "goodbye" to all of you listeners and tonight I will give an even sadder goodbye to everyone here at Derek and Romaine =(

--Katy the Intern

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Wanna be an intern on Derek and Romaine?

You have to be eligible for college credit check out the application!

SiriusXM is now recruiting for Fall session interns!  Apply online at

Tuesday, August 16, 2011


Here are the smokin' HOT pictures of yesterday's sexy guests.

I garuntee these models promoting the Ascension Beach Party are even hotter than you pictured.

Jaw dopping!

He could be making poison and I would still drink it if he fed it to me


Derek's getting a little grabby with one of the models, but then again, can you blame him?

Romaine is in heaven right now with her dream girl aka Penthouse Pet Krista Ayne!

In case those hot little models didn't do it for you, this piece of ass sure will! 

Back off of Romaine's lady!

WHOA check out that ass!! 

--Katy the intern

Monday, August 15, 2011

In case you guys missed last week...

Here's a recap of our guests =)

Glennda Testone, executive director of the LGBT Community Center discussing the Braking The Cycle ride
Comedian Negin Farsad
Laura Matanah and Hannah Meacock Ross of Rainbow Rumpus
The Queen of Green Hedda Lettuce
Musician Tom Goss
Eddie Shapiro of Gay Days Anaheim
That's Entertainment with Maggie Furlong of AOL TV's The Show Girl

I'm sad to say that today kicks off my second to last week as an intern with Derek and Romaine =(  Hope you bitches don't forget about me =)

--Katy the intern

Wednesday, August 10, 2011


So as everyone should know by now, Amber will be riding on behalf of the DNR show for the Braking the Cycle ride.

Amber's original fundriasing goal was $20,000. And yesterday, thanks to all of you generous and kind listeners, we reached our goal!

With this exciting break through for Amber, Romaine announced last night that she will be contributing her efforts to this ride as well by volunteering as a worker!  With this announcement, we have now raised our goal to $35,000!

Please, take the time to donate anything, even just $1 towards the fight against AIDS.  Every penny counts and it will only take just 2 minutes of your time.

Go to to learn more about this noble fundraiser and to donate to Amber.

Not convinced yet?

Here are a few facts that I copied and pasted right from the website that will better inform everyone about the Braking The Cycle efforts and cause:

The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender Community Center has been at the forefront of providing services in the fight against HIV/AIDS since 1983.

The Center’s Mental Health and Social Services Department, its Youth Program and the related prevention and health policy programs serve more than 3,000 LGBT New Yorkers annually.

1,200 LGBT adults are annually assisted on-site, 33% of whom are people living with HIV or AIDS. An additional 1000 people are provided services off-site, for a total of 7,500 contacts per year.

More than 1,000 teens come to the Center annually for services and leadership training in HIV prevention.

Numerous HIV/AIDS support and advocacy groups meet regularly at the Center. But there’s much more left to be done. Please join the effort, and help us break the cycle of HIV/AIDS.

What Your Participation Buys

Your $3,500 in fundraising allows us to create and distribute over 2,000 safer sex kits.

Your $5,000 in fundraising will send eight at-risk youth to our summer camp – a safe space where they’ll learn to avoid HIV infection through adult and peer counseling.

Your $10,000 in fundraising pays for a full year of counseling for a group of 20 people newly diagnosed with HIV.

And if you'd like to cut out the middle man, here is a link that specifically links you to Amber's page where you can donate right to her =)

So please, help Amber and us at the DNR show reach our goal.  =)

--Katy The Intern

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Hello Bitches!

Last night we had Glennda Testone Executive Director of the NY LGBT Center and Clay Willilams a third time rider in Braking the Cycle on the show to talk about the AIDS ride from Boston to NYC. We had a blast with them but Derek and Romaine were disappointed to find out I am currently in 3rd place in the who has raised the most funds contest, needless to say we pulled in a bunch of donations during the show last night and the DNR team is well on the way to reaching our goal! Anyway after the interview we snapped a photo with Glennda, Clay, Eric, Derek, Romaine and me (the short one in the middle). Thanks for all of your support!

-Producer Amber

To donate please visit

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Tonight's show!

On tonight's show we will be having Christopher Heywood, the VP of Travel & Tourism Public Relations for NYC & Company, on to talk about their new tourism programs for the LGBT community.  Call in at 7:05 PM EST with any and all NY gay marriage questions!  866-305-6887

Then at 8 PM EST Jeremy Blacklow from will be in to talk all the current celeb tabloid rummors.

And of course.. Happy Hour and Koffee Klatsch.

Monday, August 1, 2011

Update by Katy the Intern!

Let me start off this entry by saying I have a serious (no pun intended) case of the blues since my graduation from my internship with Derek and Romaine is less than a month away =(

In any case, we've had an exciting few weeks back at the studio after R Family Vacations.  While we've all been missing Hedda Lettuce who has been a phoner these past few Wednesdays because she has had a slew of comedy shows on the Hudson, we've still been graced by many exciting guests.

Here's a recap of last weeks guests!
- Mara Keisling of the National Center for Transgender Equality
-Ron Miller of Village Lighthouse, Inc
-Josh Berman, creator of Drop Dead Diva
-Tamie Adaya, of Shangri-La Hotel in Santa Monica
-Noah Levy of In Touch Weekly  (We had a super juicy Tabloid Tuesday this passed week between the passing of Amy Winehouse and learning that a crazy fan once left a baby on Dolly Parton's doorstep!)
-Ed Salvato (Travel expert)
-Patrick and Michael from A Note to My Kid (Very touching segment)
-Brian Gianelli from XFinityTV

And this week, we'll be joined by Zachary Barnett with the Abzyme Research Foundation, Christopher Heywood for NYC Tourism, Jeremy Blacklow, and Steve Hayes Tired Old Queen at the Movies upon many other exciting people!

Additionally, I'm proud to say I am finally working on a promo!!  I'm hoping that by the last week of my internship I'll be able to bang out a promo in minutes just like Katie!  I've had a few faux pas on the board (Whoops, sorry guys =/) and I definitely need to work on that, but otherwise, I am so proud of a lot of the work I have been doing here.  I love being able to be creative and do fun and exciting research for Derek and Romaine and I love being given new tasks because it makes me feel trusted and responsible.

I can't wait for you guys to hear my promos (right now I have only done one, but I will make it a mission to complete several more before my internship is over) and I truly am going to miss being here on the show with everyone =)

Until next time,
Katy the intern

Sunday, July 31, 2011

Gay Cinema 101: Ten Movies You Can't Miss

In honor of Derek's book Colonnade: A Life In Columns (a collection of his FantasyMan Island columns along with his own recollections of his first two years in Manhattan) now being available for the Kindle, we thought it would be a good time to check out some of the other columns he wrote around that time.
A few months after the start of Derek and Romaine on Sirius Radio back in 2003, Derek wrote the following column recommending essential movies for gay men to see. Since it often comes up with Steve Hayes, Tired Old Queen at the Movies, or Hedda Lettuce join the show, his essential list is reprinted here.

Gay Cinema 101: Ten Movies You Can't Miss

August 15, 2003 - There is a newly out intern down at my Sirius radio show. At my recent summer party (A Midsummer's Day's Debauchery!), some of my guests were shocked to discover that Bobby Intern, as we call him, hadn't seen the recent Oscar winner and instant gay classic, Chicago.

Longtime FantasyMan Island reader Paul suggested that I create a list of the 10 essential movies that all gay people must see in order to graduate into full-fledged homosexuality. I couldn't bring myself to list just 10, and I am certain that you have additional suggestions. Feel free to send them along. However, I think this list should cover it for most people. So, without further ado: Bobby Intern (and all you other boys out there just like him), this column is just for you.

Friday, July 29, 2011

Happy Summer Bitches!! (update from intern Chanel)

Hello everyone! Yes, it's been awhile since I've last posted (last semester, actually). Forgive my lateness as I've been super-duper busy working here at the Derek and Romaine Show. What a difference one semester can make! I started off screening phone calls, and now I am running the boards during the show!  Photobucket

I'm starting to have separation anxiety because I only have 4 more weeks left with DnR! (sniffles)... Nonetheless, this summer has been awesome. One of the highlights for me, was celebrating the passing of the gay marriage bill with Derek and Romaine.  Everyone screamed and shouted in the studio when we watched with anticipation, the votes being tallied.  A very exciting but rather emotional experience.  New York City has always been the city to set the standards for the rest of the world.  What a wonderful feeling to be accepted for who you are... I've learned so much about myself through a gay person's eyes.

Another highlight of the show (and my summer) is DnR listener, "Stanton."  I adore Stanton. There is something so genuine about his personality. He's like the one aunt that loves you to death, but will put you in check if you ever get caught slipping! (It's all love, thank you Aunty Stanton).  Since Stanton loved my last model picture I put up last semester, I thought I'd post another one for the summer, just for him! (Eat your heart out Stanton) Photobucket

So here's to the last 4 weeks on the Derek and Romaine show. I'm gonna cram in as much experience as I can and make it all memorable! Have a great summer everyone (-;

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Derek and Romaine Have Books!

You enjoy the show, but have you read the books written by your favorite hosts?

Romaine was the first to come out with a book in 2005 when she released her memoir: The Whole World Was Watching: Living in the Light of Matthew Shepard. Then, in 2009, Derek released his first memoir, Colonnade: A Life In Columns.

Now, Colonnade: A Life In Columns is available for Kindle! So for those of you who have been waiting for the digital version, it is here now. It will be available for the iPad in the next week.

And coming in August, Derek's latest book, When Nightlife Falls. In the new book, Derek talks about his work life with Romaine, travels the country with outrageous porn personalities, and falls in love.

Want a sneak peek? Here is the photo that will be part of the cover of the new book.

That's Erik Rhodes, dragging model Christopher Schram along the floor. What do you think?

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Photo update!

So as you know, DNR has just returned from R Family Vacations at the Club Med in Sandpiper, FL.  And just so you guys know, as if she didn't already have enough, Romaine has returned with even more vinylmations!!

While we missed Romaine this past week because she stayed behind at Club Med and spent time with her daughter and neice, we had a blast in the studio with guest hosts comedians Dave Rubin and Adam Sank.

In other news, here are some pictures of Derek and Romaine with various guests who we had in our studio within the past 2 months =)

Here are Derek and Romaine with Rutina Wesley.  You most likely know her as True Blood's Tara Thornton... best friend of Sookie Stackhouse!

This dream boat posing with DNR is MSNBC's news anchor Thomas Roberts.... back off bitches, Derek called dibs!

Just a typical night in the studio with ADD Jeff... well, maybe it's not so typical considering the half naked stud Zachery joined us to mix up some cocktails for pride weekend here in NYC ;-)

Some adorable models displaying Baskitwear swim wear for men... no big deal ;-)

Derek and Romaine posing with the beautiful, real life Barbie Doll known only as the fabulous Amanda Lepore!

This sexy piece of ass right here is Jincey Lumpkin... pioneer of Juicy Pink Box porn ;-)

Derek and Romaine with former boy band sensation Lance Bass aka the newest addition to OutQ!  You can catch him on Friday's for "The Pop Ten" countdown.  It's tearin' up intern Katy's heart that she couldn't be there to meet one of her childhood idols

Here are DNR with Peter Yarrow of Peter, Paul, and Mary!  It was a pleasure having him in studio.

And last, but certainly not least, Derek and Romaine pose with the smokin' hot Victoria Zdrok and her equally stunning husband.  If looks could rule the world....

So now that you bitches have a taste of the gorgeous and glamourous guests who grace us here at Derek and Romaine, I'd just like to say that I am having an AWESOME second semester here with everyone.  While I'm continuing to learn various tasks associated with the preparations and inner workings of a radio show, I'm also learning so many fasinating things about sexuality, gender, LGBT issues, and LGBT culture.  I'm incredibly priviledged to have landed and internship here with OutQ because I'm learning more than I could ever possibly learn in school. From pop culture to modern day civil rights to sex education, I know I will be leaving this internship with knowledge that most people never obtain within a lifetime.

So I just want to extend gratitude and thanks to Derek, Romaine, Amber, Katie, iShaq, and even Hedda Lettuce (my favorite reoccuring guest!!) for all of these opportunities.  I assure you guys that even after I graduate from my internship, I will not let all of the things I've learned go to waste =)

--Katy the Intern